The winner: The Paco:
"15 grand for art school you say? Yes sir, I think this will make very compelling evidence at the fraud trial."

captainapathy
Dude, you have some really wierd tastes in porn.

jrduncans
"...and that's how baby Jesus was made!"

Andrick
...and then a giant gold nugget fell from the sky onto the mountain being worshipped by the Dancing People. Lo, they were so happy that they hunted the buffalo with rifles and ran with palm fronds. But the mountain split into four wildly dancing peaks, and the bushes burned and the people did much running for their lives. Then it came to pass that a red cat and a white bird begat a brown bear, and this so overjoyed the Dancing People that they changed their dance to passion and henceforth they were known as the Dirty Dancing People.

Daigan
... and that finishes our last class in astrophysics. Good luck to everyone on the final, and may you all burn in hell... I mean, do well.

The P.u.P.P
Wait a minute! This isn't McDonalds!

BloodEye
I said playdough, but NOOOOO, fingerpaints 'help express creativity.' Better grab a rag and help me clean this before it dries, or I'm going to 'creativly express' on your ass, bucko.

Ragged Glory
"Now see here, son. This is what happens when you let mommy drive the car."

BloodEye
...well I do belive the artist's use of a simplfied medium does help to capture the socio-religious expressions inherant in our culture, but IS IT ART?

kdp
"And as you can see your honor, my client was obviously too drunk to even remember his name, let alone draw that on the Popemobile."

BobDMighty
I just don't get some of this new "anime" porn.

The_Muffin_Man
Even the cavemen had good taste in porn!

Darthen Wulf
Hmmmm... Maybe there's a bit too much figures... Looks too much sophisticated...

The Paco
"50 million to bioengineer supermen, and this is what they feel is an 'encouraging' sign?"

The Paco
"... so, um, you see Miss Wilkins, that's why my paper isn't in today!"

The Paco
"In other news, this drawing has been on display at the Mars Smithsonian for the past 3 weeks as the oldest known cave painting. It was actually found being held on by a magnetic rock to a strange metal box. Narbox Fleem, the discoverer and head Earthlife archeologist feels that the box was meant to teach primitive earthlings. Inside were the remains of unkown life-forms, some in artificial containers. Based on the state of decay and the composite of the box, Fleem believes this is how earthlings were created, and when they reached maturity, they were able to leave the box and learn what they needed from the box itself, from these primitive drawings left behind by previous generations. Surviving earthlings could not be reached for comment because they scattered for cover and disappeared in walls and floor cracks when we turned on lights."

The Paco
This Is Picasso's Hell

Quinn
Dude, what did we smoke last night?

elvengrrl
"...and that's how I spent my summer vacation."

elvengrrl
"Hey...there's fire on that thar mountain."

elvengrrl
"How in the hell am I going to put this into my portfolio?"

elvengrrl
"...and that is how Britney Spears was simultaneously destroyed with *Nsync. and there was much rejoicing."

elvengrrl
A: it's written in aramaic!
B: They're drawings, you stupid git.

captainapathy
...And lo, the stick figures did all get huge dildos from the radiation of the comet.

The Paco
"...sir, I don't care how struck by inspiration you are, if you don't stop, I'm going to make you clean every table in this taco bell and pay for thos condiments!"

The Paco
"Jesus, Dave... I just wrote my NAME in the snow."

The Paco
"We found this in Tolkien's childhood belongings."

The Paco
(from really close) "Now *sniff* the final touch... *snort* aaah....aaaaahh...AAAAAHHH... ACHOO!"

atomic guy
Historian: "So, you see, contrary to popular belief, the first bipedal creatures were actually stick figures. They ran around and did things you see. Unfortunately, all of them were wiped out when I giant buffalo and a comet came crashing down on their annual picnic around the volcano. But from the volcano came a bird and fox, who mated to give rise to the golden bear, who was the precursor to all other life on earth. I believe this is what these drawings mean."
Student: "....This is magic marker. You drew these today, didn't you?"
Historian: *hangs head.* ".....yes...."

Andrick
Lemme see if I got this straight. You never went to any art classes because you thought art students were gay, you have never even attempted to doodle anything in your adult life. Just to make a point you slapped this together with some colored pencils borrowed from your nephew and declared out loud that it was art when somebody walked up to you to buy it for two hundred thousand dollars... and you refused because he was bourgeois?!?

netjaws
the beautiful story of a boy who loved his monkey very much.

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